Wednesday, January 4, 2006

"That's Weird"

    I can't believe that Gem  (libragem007) would tag me, hoping for me to reveal my "weirdness".    I am quite the normal guy.....I mean I go through life, in a most normal manner....I just try to spice it a bit so it doesn't appear too normal!.....So, when was the last time I had a "weird" feeling......   ah yes!    Every Sunday afternoon there is a radio program that I MUST listen to, or Sunday does not feel like Sunday. It's a local music program called "Folk and Accoustic Sunday" (on the NPR radio station)....Its a smooth blend of old folk, current folk, Bluegrass and international folk.....  Regardless of what i might be doing on that afternoon,the music has me sit down in my mind and pull up a chair on the porch and have a tall cold glass of iced tea. The program really makes my Sunday......if I miss hearing it...yes, I feel weird.

     "Weird"....that's right.....just last week at the Christmas lunch, the secretaries were gabbing about men, and how they stare and gawk. One secretary spotted me listening in and chimed..."except for sweet Marc...when he talks to you he makes eye contact, not chest contact" The women all nodded in agreement that I was the perfect gentleman.........   I grinned.....and laughed to myself...." I can really do that??? All these years I've been staring at their chests and they say I'm looking into their eyes!...Gee..that's weird!

    If I can't think of something that is weird..I'm certain that the wife can!  She swears that "I can't Chew gum and drive at the same time" that's not true...but one time  tried chewing gum while having sex....and when we were finsihed, the gum was gone! I'm not telling where it was found, but that's the last time I'll "chew and screw".

    Oh yes, which brings me to.....when I can't find my wallet....yes, I get weird about that......Imagine, I have handled millions of dollars worth of jewels in my days, I never get nervous if one gets misplaced at the factory...but my wallet, (which usually never has more than 40 bucks in it!) if its missing for 5 minutes...I get ....GAS!  I mean turbulent gas folks.....I guess if I can't find my wallet, I'm hoping it will find me!   Oh, by the way, whenever I misplace my wallet, it takes just 5 minutes for my wife to snif, snif and yell "HEY WHAT DID YOU DO.......LOSE YOUR WALLET!"

      OK...4 weird things down...and one to go....hey, I need to make a run to the bathroom.....WAIT...which reminds me.....Women in take so much time in there.....and sometimes you go in there in pairs?  You always come out smiling or grinning.....Me? I'm happy that I came and went...and I'll never take another guy to mens room with me....I hope that doesn't make me wierd!

    OK gotta go.....I'll be tagging someone who hasn't been tagged with this when I get back!         Love and peace to you all....Not so wierd, Marc :)


libragem007 said...

lol lol! wonderful Marc...right on!
LOL! {thanks for playing along}
Gem :-D

firestormkids04 said...

Oh, I needed that laugh this afternoon!  I'm still at work and this 8 hours has been tough.  thanks so much.  Blessings, Penny

ally123130585918 said...

lol Marc - Chewing gum - is that weird lol.....I needed to read this it has made my day......Ally

dawngepfer said...

My compliments to Gem for tagging you!  This was GREAT!!!  I am alone in the office, much too early, and laughing my a** off (which is a good thing because its entirely too big!).  Way to go, Marc, and way to go, Gem!

philadlfiagrl said...

"chew and screw" hahahhahaa --- i had one of those recently! he didnt lose his gum

i guess i wasnt all that good!! LOL


mariebm56 said...

Very few entries make me actually laugh OUT LOUD, this one did it!
It all started with the "looking into the eyes & not the chest", how did you manage getting away with that one?
I continued laughing with the "chew & screw", then still laughing at the "GAS"
You are too funny!!!!!
Thanks for sharing your wierdness~

fitzzer said...

You are so darn funny!

bedazzzled1 said...

Excellent. Finally, I discover a perv in our midst! You disguise it so well. ::tossing you a pack of gum while wearing a gas mask::

sierrajazz said...

Our little weird things is what makes each of us unique.  I enjoy your weirdness, sense of humor and sensual passionate side.... it all makes for a very interesting guy with lots to share.

globetrotter2u said...


This was truly glorious and hilariously funny and cute!

As I read it, I truly enjoyed envisioning your various 5 stages of weirdness!

I'd love to tune in to that NPR radio station though I'm not sure that the NPR that I hear is the same NPR that you listen to. I get Fort Myers and Naples, is that yours, too? Let me know the channel, I'm sure I'd love to hear that program, too!

Regarding your recent Christmas lunch... no way are you smiling at faces! I can see you standing in the corner smiling shyly as you catch overt glimpses of bosoms and legs, while fantasizing all the while of what it would be like to.... well never mind... I have no idea what your secretaries actually look like or else I'd venture a guess about your fantasies!

As far as chewing and screwing go... I'll bet you could get quite creative with a little sticky stuff in certain parts of the female body... but best not go there either... already said too much...hehe.  Bet you and I could make a comedy out of chew and blew... ouch!

Your wife is .....well ...probably typical. You should have married a shiksa. I haven't a clue what's in my husband's wallet, checking account or 401K for that matter!

As far as the bathroom thing goes... I could go on for days. Women get weirded out about going to the bathroom in pairs at restaurants and functions etc. They need each other to do that properly though I haven't a clue why. It gets even weirder when we pass the toilet paper under the compartment when a friend has "run out". And then we go on to discuss why the damned toilet has run out of paper as we pass and wipe. Well enough of that, too.

I got tagged too... quite a while back. I still owe...

And I'm still thinking.

Mine can't beat yours, though. Your the weirdest normal dude I've ever not met!

Great entry Marc!


tschamberland said...

Not so much 'weird' as interesting.

Ummm, not to push tagging into the 'overkill' zone, but I'm tagging you too.  5 things that make you CRAZY. (like maybe being tagged numerous times....)


onemoretina said...

    Nice to know that you are a 'gentleman' ... or that you are just really discreet  ! lol   Nice list.  Especially the one about getting gas over your lost wallet.  I have just the opposite problem.  When I get gas .... I lose money in my wallet.  About thirty bucks a tankful.  Sorry ... bad joke, that one ! lol    Tina

demandnlilchit said...

I grew up listening to bluegrass on the radio at my babysitter's house, it delights me to know end to hear it today. And I love that XR Aol radio and satellite radio has a station that plays only bluegrass, takes me back to corn bread, pinto beans and the daytime soap of dark shadows! I still keep in touch with that wonderful woman who helped raise me way back when!

tschamberland said...

LOL!  This was cute....chew and screw...LMAO!


gdireneoe said...

LMAO!  Dangit I missed this!  Damned alerts...  I SOOO wish I could call you typical and say I'm disappointed...can't do it.  You're too completely adorable...all be it weirdly odiferous. ;)  C.